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lyrics

So I’m walking downtown
on a summer's day
thinking about things like
life and love
and the fact that bras are really expensive
for no apparent reason

when some teenage boys
walk toward me
and I don’t think much of it
because teenage boys
stop being relevant to me
in the early 2000s

and they look right at me
then they start to laugh
and point and snigger
and then they start shouting
Whaaaaaaaale!
Whaaaaaaaale!
because I’m fat
That’s original

so I’m walking downtown
on a summer’s day
thinking about things like
why do I leave the house
when I’m clearly disgusting enough
to make kids start yelling

and I keep on walking
and start to wonder
what their mums would say
if they heard them hassling a stranger
about something that’s none of their business

but it’s not uncommon
for people to have an opinion
about other people’s bodies
but most refrain from shouting
Whaaaaaaaale!
Whaaaaaaaale!
because that’s really fucking rude

so I’m walking downtown
on a summer’s day
that feels a bit less sunny
because people are assholes
and I want to go home
but I still have to buy loo roll

and I think about how
at least I’m kind enough to smile at strangers
instead of saying things designed to hurt
Just because I can
and that diet and exercise
can change your body
but cannot change your soul
and I’d rather be a whale
than someone who thinks it’s okay to be a dick

credits

from Songs From Radio EUGH - Vol. 2, released March 12, 2022

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Troubadette New Zealand

In the 12th century, troubadours sang songs of chivalry to noble families. In the 21st century, Troubadette sings songs of bikini waxing, dismemberment, and some guy's dick to anyone who'll listen. Channeling the energy of a kindergarten teacher and the wisdom of your favourite wine aunty, Troubadette has been making musical mayhem across Aotearoa for over 20 years. ... more

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