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A Good Investment

from Songs From Radio EUGH - Vol. 2 by Troubadette

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lyrics

I’m having trouble sleeping
It seems I can’t stop my mind
Running through the things that I’m supposed to be
But I don’t count sheep
I alphabetise each one of my failings
I’ve never made it past
The letter E
E for Egocentric
Since I never shut the hell up about me

Is home a place or person or an organ in your chest?
Am I meant to feel there’s somewhere I belong?
If I arm myself with charm can I trick people into caring?
Will it be enough to make them think I’m strong?
Or is it just cellophane
That everyone could see through all along?

And if I earned a dollar for each thing I got right
And owed one for the things that I got wrong
How would it all balance?
Would I be a good investment?
Would I cancel myself out?
Would I be worth it?

What’s the point in trying to predict what’s coming next
When so far nothing’s worked out as I planned?
Are the things I want so out of reach or is it all my fault?
Am I stupid? Do I just not understand?
Or was there a moment
Where I screwed up and let life get out of hand?

I’m having trouble sleeping, I’m not sure exactly why
But I feel a bit like I’m a nerve exposed
Like I’m buzzing on a frequency that isn’t quite my own
Like my skin’s on inside out inside my clothes
I don’t know if it’s a comfort
If this feeling’s something everybody knows

credits

from Songs From Radio EUGH - Vol. 2, released March 12, 2022

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Troubadette New Zealand

In the 12th century, troubadours sang songs of chivalry to noble families. In the 21st century, Troubadette sings songs of bikini waxing, dismemberment, and some guy's dick to anyone who'll listen. Channeling the energy of a kindergarten teacher and the wisdom of your favourite wine aunty, Troubadette has been making musical mayhem across Aotearoa for over 20 years. ... more

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